Dear political candidate (I will try to use words of no more than two syllables here):
I promise that if I receive a phone call from your campaign, whether it's a live person or one of those robot callers, you can count on my casting a vote for someone other than you.
If election day rolls around and all of you have pissed me off, I intend to write in myself in lieu of voting for one of you SOBs.
vershteht?